In each monthly issue, Runner Triathlete News will publish one chapter from the new book "Becoming an Ironman." This month's story begins in the October 2001 issue of RTN.

To order your copy of "Becoming an Ironman: First Encounters with the Ultimate Endurance Event," send $23 per copy (plus $2.95 per order for shipping/handling) to Runner Triathlete News, P.O. Box 19909, Houston, TX 77224. Please allow 4-6 weeks for delivery.

One thing I've realized is that there were probably times in the past when I was right on the edge and, for whatever reason, I didn't fall into that depression. Growing up swimming was good for me in that exercise helped keep it from happening. I know there's more to it than that, but I think exercise does help me control it. I've also learned to identify when it starts coming on and talk myself through the feelings, look at them reasonably, and not make such a big deal out of this or that.

I also signed up for Ironman Florida. I made a commitment to finish an Ironman and mapped out a training plan. I raced about once a month leading up to it. Now I'm definitely hooked.

I was even more hooked during my Ironman, realizing how well I was doing. I got on the run ahead of the guy who I'd come in with. The first few miles of the run my stomach didn't feel very good and my legs hurt a lot. Going in I thought I could run a 3:30 marathon and if everything was going great, I could go 3:20. But I had never run a marathon before.

I'd planned on doing one back in February, but got hurt training for it. So yeah, I thought I'd like to run 3:30, but knew I could just as easily do 5:30. I checked my watch the first couple of miles and was running between a 7:00 and 7:30 per-mile pace. About four miles into it, three guys blew by me, one right after the other. I couldn't even think about trying to stay with them. One of them was in my age group; the other two were pros. I was still thinking to myself, 'Wow, I'm in the top ten right now, not too shabby -- hang in there.' Yeah, it's a race, but more than anything it's a race with yourself.

Perhaps that's not so easy for pros to think when they have more riding on it. Hopefully I'll find myself in that situation at some point, but at that moment, I felt on track to reach the highest goal I set for the race. It was easy to feel good about what I was doing and concentrate on my own race. Although I was definitely keeping an eye out. It was a two-loop, out-and-back run course, so I had plenty of opportunities to see people. I couldn't help counting when the guys ahead of me started coming back the other way, and once I made the turn seeing how close people were to me and so on. For the most part I thought everybody looked fresh. I didn't think I was going to be able to run anybody down, but apparently a couple of guys ahead of me had total meltdowns and dropped out.

The second lap was a little more confusing because people were all over the place, most on their first lap. Between miles sixteen and twenty-one were toughest for me. I started to think about walking, but talked myself out of it. Near mile twenty I started drinking Coke at the aid stations and within a couple of miles I got revived. Of course knowing I had only five miles left helped too.

I came over a small hill and made a sharp turn into the finish line. I had visualized what it would be like to finish the way I wanted to and knowing I had exceeded those goals was overwhelming. My run split was 3:29 -- right on what I expected -- and my overall time was 9:16.

I was incredibly happy, but there was more relief than I'd thought there would be and I was more mentally drained than I thought I would be. I wasn't sure exactly where I had finished, but pretty convinced I had gotten my slot to Hawaii. I ended up twelfth overall and second in my age group.

I've always been a big fan of endurance sports. Growing up swimming I value hard work and endurance and ironman struck a chord with me. Being able to qualify for the Hawaii Ironman means I'll be able to subject myself to the ultimate test. Given everything I experienced in terms of going through depression and being out of shape physically and mentally, it was very rewarding to be able to bounce back with such a high achievement. I don't think I could appreciate the high point of qualifying as much as I do without having come from such a low point.

Brent hopes to compete professionally some day. Whether or not he can race at the top, he plans to enjoy racing, training, and the experiences of meeting new people and seeing new places through triathlon.